There Is Nothing Like a Good Off-Season Hoops Story: Bobby Gonzalez

The news-ticker in the college hoops world works 24/7 nine months out of the year. During the off-season, when the ticker moves just a bit slower, stories that would usually get pushed to the back-burner get over-examined. Even if the stories are from well beyond left field, every writer, analyst and blogger in the country is talking about it, because, well, there isn't much else to talk about.

While most of the discussion and debate this off-season has been surrounding conference expansion and anything involving possible NCAA violations, there have been a handful of wildly-entertaining news stories to over-examine and debate to keep us occupied until Marathon Madness.

Troy Machir, BIAH's resident brainiac on the ridiculous and the unnecessary will be providing you with a breakdown of the most outlandish news stories of the off-season.

The summer heat can make people do some crazy things. But what happens when somebody who is already borderline crazy decides to up the ante?

Keep reading to find out.

Bobby Gonzalez goes bargain hunting

Gonzo from the Muppets was crazy and kinda funny. Dr. Gonzo from Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas was crazy and kinda awesome. Bobby "Gonzo" Gonzalez from Seton Hall (formerly) was crazy and kinda even more crazy.

Bobby Gonzalez was one of the most polarizing coaches in the entire country this past year. But if you do your research, you discover that this year wasn't a fluke. Bobby Gonzalez is just crazy, and not the good type of crazy. We're talking straight-jacket/padded-room crazy.

Let's take a quick gander at what went down this past season for Gonzo and his team:

- Missouri-transfer Keon Lawrence got arrested in November for driving drunk, with a suspended license, when he crashed his car going the wrong way on the Garden State Parkway.

- Duquesne-transfer Robert Mitchell was kicked out of the program in late March for publicly blasting his head coach.

"It’s hard to stay consistent as a player, when the coach isn’t consistent”

- Two days later, Mitchell was arrested for breaking into a house and robbing eight people at gunpoint. He was charged with robbery kidnapping and burglary.

- New Mexico-transfer Herb Pope was ejected from the team's final game, an opening round lost to Texas Tech in the N.I.T for throwing a ball-tap groin-punch nut-shot low-blow to a Texas Tech player

- Gonzo went off on profanity-laced tirades against two of the best college hoops reporters in the country: Gary Parrish and Adam Zagoria.

- He also cursed out the Dean of Seton Hall's law school Patt Hobbs, stating

“Nobody’s gonna tell me how to run my motherf—ing program. Not you, not Monsignor, not Joe Quinlan. This is my f—ing program. My f—ing program,”

- Following the incident with the dean, Gonzo was fired. He then sued Seton Hall for wrongful termination, and sought to collect the remaining salary on his contract.

And to think, I haven't even gotten to the main reason Gonzo had such an exciting summer. You might be thinking, "What could Gonzo possibly do that would top all of his past problems?"

Bobby Gonzo decided to get his "Winona Ryder" on.

Yeah, that's right, Bobby Gonzalez, a former head coach who had a six-digit-salary got arrested for shoplifting. What was he stealing, you ask? Was it a flat screen TV, an Ipod, a car, or possibly a rolex watch?

Nope. Coach Gonzo got busted for stealing a purse. Call it a man purse, murse, European , a satchel or an attache case if you will. But for the sake of this argument, let's call it a purse, because well, that's what it looks like to me.

That's just ridiculous. But what's even more ridiculous is that a former D-1 coach, who made six figures a year, stole a purse.

There is no possible way a sane human being cannot think this guy is crazy. I mean, if you are going to steal something, and get caught for it, you have to go big. Steal a Porsche, steal rare jewelry, hell steal your own sports memorabilia. But for gods sake, if you are a male public figure who works in sports, don't get caught stealing a women's accessory.

Gonzalez's sister, one of his most adamant supporters, stated that the theft was just a misunderstanding. But seriously, come on, who are we suppose to believe, the high school teen who works at the Polo store, or a stark-raving-mad head coach with a history of lunacy?

Gonzalez has gained some closure recently, as he settled his wrongful termination suit with Seton Hall, and has plead not guilty to shoplifting charges.

This story would still be ridiculous even if you removed all the past digressions. I mean, what type of guy steals a purse?

The answer? The same type of guy who curses out his employers, blames players for losses, and confronts every reporter who has something negative to say about his program.

There might not be another coach in the country with a nickname as fitting as coach Gonzalez's, because after all, the man is crazy.

Continue reading...

Coaches in court

Why does it always seem like news like this comes in bunches?

Rick Pitino's trial is over, but the ordeal isn't quite finished yet. The attorney for Karen Sypher, who, if you remember, was found guilty on all six counts as a result of her extortion efforts against Pitino, has filed a motion asking for a new trial as a result of the perjury committed by one or more of the prosecution's witnesses. They have asked for 45 days to investigate. Can you imagine what would happen if Sypher was actually granted a new trial? Would we have to hear all about Quick Rick's 15 seconds of fame again?

Staying in the Big East, Bobby Gonzalez has solved one of his legal issues. Gonzo sued Seton Hall for wrongful termination after the Pirate's first round NIT loss. Gonzo said he was wrongfully terminated with two years left ton his contract. Yesterday, the two sides settled, with the terms left confidential. Gonzo still is facing charges for allegedly attempting to steal a $1,400 satchel.

And then there is Andy Kennedy. Back in 2008, Kennedy was arrested for allegedly punching and yelling racial slurs at a cab driver that refused to allow five people into his cab. Kennedy filed a defamation lawsuit which was finally settled yesterday. Apparently, all Kennedy needed was an apology from the cab driver.

Continue reading...

I would LOVE if Gonzo got a TV deal

By now you all know about Bobby Gonzalez, the former Seton Hall head coach and the current accused shoplifter.

Currently unemployed, Gonzo has a lot of time on his hands, and undoubtedly has some bills piling up (lawyers ain't free, my friend). As he is currently all-but unhireable in the collegiate ranks, Gonzo told the New York Times that a couple of NBA teams had inquired about his services. Jeff Goodman backed him up.

But that wasn't what caught my eye.

This is the line that caught my eye, and made twitter quite enjoyable to read Wednesday afternoon:

"Or I might be in TV for a year or two," Gonzalez said. "Let the smoke clear."

People can joke about it all they want. Gonzo is a lunatic and has done some really out-on-control stuff over the last six months. (And in his career as a whole, for that matter.)

You wouldn't wanna see this guy on TV?
(photo credit: NJ.com)

But you are out of your mind if you don't want this guy on television. Its not because he is a great basketball mind, like a Jay Bilas. Its not because he is well-spoken, like a Fran Fraschilla or a Doug Gottlieb. And its certainly not because he's lovable the way that Bill Raftery and Dick Vitale are.

No, it is because Gonzo is a lunatic that he would make great television. Think about it. Why is Charles Barkley everyone's favorite analyst? Because he is libel to say anything, anything, on camera. Granted, Chuck is thousands of times more lovable than Gonzo, but you get my point.

Gonzo is firey. He's got an attitude. He seems like the kind of guy that will forever believe he is right, and by proving him wrong you only stoke the flames. And if his recent history is any indication, it doesn't matter who he is talking too. Gonzo will speak his mind.

In a world where reality TV reigns supreme, Real Housewives has become a successful series, and Jersey Shore is one of the most popular shows on television, isn't that exactly what an audience would want?

If my vote counts, I say put the man in front of a camera. At the very least, he won't be boring.
Continue reading...

Bobby Gonzalez pleads not guilty

As you should know by now, Bobby Gonzalez was arrested for shoplifting a $1,400 man-purse/satchel from a Polo Ralph Lauren store at the Short Hills Mall last month.

It was the culmination of what has been a horrific four months for the former Seton Hall coach. Watching someone have a complete meltdown in a public forum is not a comfortable experience. The last time I addressed the Gonzalez situation, I urged you to avoid laughing and joking about Gonzalez.

But ... ahh, its just gotten so hard not too!

Take a look at this picture the New Jersey Star Ledger got of Gonzalez in court today:


I mean, do I even need to comment on this? Gonzo's reputation is that of a man just a bit off his rocker. Doesn't this picture scream "I got a case of the crazies"? Can he look any creepier? Is it just me, or does he look a little too much like Jack Nicholson in The Shining?

He stole a satchel. Not just any satchel. A $1,400 Polo satchel. The unintentional comedy is off the charts. (There's a Hangover joke to make in there somewhere.)

Anyway, Gonzo pleaded not guilty to shoplifting charges in Essex County Court in Newark today. And while it certainly is not a joking matter, especially for those in the Gonzalez family and the Seton Hall community, that picture was just too funny not to post.

Continue reading...

Bobby Gonzalez arrested for shoplifting

John Beilein hasn't exactly had the best off-season. He lost half his team and half of his coaching staff after struggling through a very disappointing 2010 season.

Andy Kennedy hasn't been celebrating either, as his Ole Miss team lost three of their top four scorers from a team that missed the NCAA Tournament again last season.

Lorenzo Romar lost two potential one-and-done recruits to John Calipari. Rick Pitino may have as well.

But none of those four come close to the off-season that Bobby Gonzalez has had.

First, there was his Seton Hall teams unceremonious exit from the first round of the NIT, complete with a couple of shots below the belt. Six days later, he was fired by Seton Hall, something that always seems to happen when you decide to curse out your boss. Of course, he decided to sue his former employers over the firing, going on camera with the NJ Star Ledger to state his case. We all thought Gonzo had hit rock bottom when he was denied credentials to the NBA Draft, only to sneak in and ream out FOXSports college basketball reporter Jeff Goodman.

Boy, were we wrong.

Yesterday, Gonzo was arrested.

For shoplifting. From NorthJersey.com:

According to reports, the manager of store told police that the manager of Joe’s American Bar and Grill returned a men’s satchel to her that belonged to Polo Ralph Lauren and said an individual came into the restaurant, left the satchel with the hostess and never returned.

The satchel, valued at $1,395, was reportedly damaged in the area where a sensor tag had been attached. An investigation into the incident by the Millburn Detective Bureau resulted in an arrest warrant being issued for Robert P. Gonzalez, 47, of Harrison, N.Y., for allegedly removing the sensor device from the satchel and walking out of the store without paying for the item.

Insert Hangover joke here.

This is the bag that Gonzo allegedly stole.

Bobby has plead not guilty to the charges, and is claiming the incident to be a misunderstanding. Bobby's sister, Linda, reportedly took to the Seton Hall message boards to defend her brother, although her story doesn't exactly seem all that plausible.

To be honest, the plight of Gonzo isn't even funny to me anymore. We all know Gonzo is a jerk -- if you don't, go read this or this, and you'll start to piece it together -- but regardless of your feelings about a person, do you really find humor in watching them, and their career, meltdown in a public forum like this?

I don't.

While I'm not backing Gonzo's bid to coach again (I think it will be difficult for him to land another gig. At least guys like Tim Floyd, Larry Eustachy, Todd Bozeman won games.), I am hoping that he can learn to keep him personal life personal.

Continue reading...