The B.I.A.H Not-Top-10 Rankings

Every week, writers, publications, media outlets and bloggers issue their Top-25 rankings for the week. A majority of the time, everybody has the virtually same opinion of all the teams.

If you want to find this week's top-25 rankings, you've come to the wrong place. Here you will find our rankings for the 10 worst team performances in the NCAA. This list isn't just home to the winless mid-major bottom-feeders. No, here you will find the biggest underachievers, slumpers and teams in a funk, the worst weekly performers, and the teams that just plain suck. Now there will be teams on this list that are better than teams not on this list. But come on people, we are trying to be creative, just work with us.

Last Week's Not-Top-10 Rankings

Once again it's Wake Forest who sits atop the mountain the pile of horse manure. There have been a lot of things in college hoops for us to shake our heads at recently, but none as head-scratchingly bad as Wake Forest. Continue reading for the the third edition of B.I.A.H's Not-Top-10 Rankings.

1a.Wake Forest (1)
Record: 6-6
Evidence: Trust me, they suck

I'll try to keep it short because I don't want to waste my precious time discussing terrible basketball, and after all Wake Forest is terrible. Last week the Demon Deacons were one possession away from losing to UNC-Greensboro, a team that still hasn't won a single game. Then they go and lose to Presbyterian. Five years ago Presbyterian was competing at the D-III level. Seriously, it is inexcusable for a high-major team to lose to the Blue Hose. Congratulations Wake Forest, you are hands-down the most pathetic team in D-I college hoops. Where ever Randolph Childress is right now, he's crying. A lot.


1b. Auburn (3)
Record: 4-7
Evidence: 5 losses to mid-majors

Picking the suckier team between Auburn and Wake Forest is like trying to chose between Milli or Vanilli, because they both suck. Auburn lost back-to-back games to Rutgers and South Florida, followed up by the kiss of death, a loss to Presbyterian. At this point I think Auburn and Wake Forest need to only play each other this season so other teams don't have to come in contact with such pathetic basketball.


3. Renardo Sidney (NR)
Career Stats: 1gp, 25min, 12pt, 3rbds
Evidence: Seriously?

I don't even know what to say about Renardo Sidney at this point. He was suspended for for the entirety of last season including nine games this season for accepting impermissible benefits and later lying to NCAA investigators about the benefits. We were all anxiously awaiting to see what this big man could do, and this was his oppurtunity to give the NCAA the proverbial "F-You". But one game into his collegiate career, he throws a temper-tantrum at practice and get's suspended...Again. He's fat, he's out of shape, he's a program liabillity and he's a headcase. He's a perfect fit for the NBA.


4. Tennessee (NR)
Record: 7-3
Evidence: 3 straight losses

You all know why Tennessee makes the Not-Top-10 this week, and surprisingly enough, it has nothing to do with barbecue's at the Pearl residence. The Vols have lost three in a row, all against lesser competition. Listen, there is no shame in losing three in a row, it happens. But Tennessee had just finished their toughest stretch of non-conference play, and it is evident by the results that the Vols decided to put it in low-gear and coast until conference play starts. That's a big mistake, especially for a team that has overachieved as much as they had. But Bruce Pearl is a great motivator, and I imagine they will turn it around. Hopefully soon.


5. Kansas State/Curtis Kelly/Jacob Pullen (NR)
Record: 9-3
Evidence: Underachievement, lack of leadership, 5-finger discounts

K-State reserved their tickets for the hype-train express months ago, but never seemed to make it to the platform. They looked unipressive against Va. Tech, got slaughtered by Duke, and have back-to-back losses to suspect top-25 teams (Florida and UNLV). There has been a handful of issues affecting the wildcats thus far. Jacob Pullen isn't doing what we expected him to do. Nobobody is stepping up and answering the call. Wally Judge took a personal leave of absence, Curtis Kelly was benched earlier in the season due to lack of dedication, and Pullen handled himself poorly on the twitter machine. That's alot of distractions for one team, especially one with such high expectations. Oh, and I haven't even mentioned the most-recent incident: Pullen and Kelly recieving some free swag from a local shopping mall. That's like a basic no-no for college athletes. As much as you want free clothing, YOU CAN'T TAKE IT. These two guys are seniors. How many compliance meetings do you think they went to where this type of thing was discussed? Frank Martin's blood-pressure must be through the roof right now.


6. Michigan State (NR)
Record: 8-4
Evidence: Lack of quality wins, desire and essentially everything we expected from them

Is this the same team we all predicted to be the second-best team in the country? Listen, I'm not writing them off yet, because that would be foolish considering Izzo's late-season track record. But still, MSU hasn't had an impressive win thus far (maybe the 5-point win over Washington in Maui), and their losses have all been ugly. It's true they have only lost to ranked opponents, but they have not looked competative in any of them. Their most recent game against Texas is evidence enough. Plus when you add in the recruiting violation that Tom Izzo committed, as minor as it may have been, things aren't looking to good for the Spartans as they head into Big Ten play.


7. Oregon State (NR)
Record: 4-6
Evidence: 3 sets of back-to-back losses , overall suck-itude in general

Some people may argue this is too low for the Beavers. They have no wins that are close to being "good" and all their losses are terrible. Their last back-to-back loss-set was to Montana and George Washington. Listen, you can be a high-major bottom-feeder, and get away with it. But you can't lose to teams like George Washington or Montana (or Utah Valley, or Texas Southern, or Seattle). Oregon State should join Auburn and Wake Forest, and just play each other all season. Good teams shouldn't have to subject themselves to such bad competition.

8. Florida (NR)
Record: 9-3
Evidence: No leadership, frustrated coach, ugly loss to Jacksonville

On numerous occasions this year, Billy Donovan has noted that his team fails to exhibit leadership and desire to be the best. He called out his team to raise the level of their play atleast twice. And for a moment or two, it looked like they may have responded. After losing to Central Florida, they won three in a row, including a big win over Kansas State. But a 11-point loss to Jacksonville AT HOME derailed any thoughts that Donovan's team had changed. Just 7 days ago, we were all thinking that the SEC East could be it's own super-conference. But a Tennesee implosion and a lackluster week for Florida may have changed our opinions.

9. Marist (NR)
Record: 2-10
Evidence: 18-point loss to Holy Cross

Holy Cross had not won a single game all season yet the Red Foxes allowed them to come in to their own arena and pimp-smack them by 18 points. Marist is 2-3 at home but their three losses have all be by more than 15-points. To make matters worse, they also have a loss to Wake Forest, and we all know how much Wake Forest sucks.


10. Virginia (NR)
Record: 8-4
Evidence: False Identifacation

There were literally no expectations for the Cavaliers this season before they went on the road and defeated a smoking-hot Minnesota team and a ranked Virginia Tech team. They won four in a row before they faced Norfolk State, a 1-8 MEAC team. Virginia won, but it was ugly. They trailed most of the game and escaped with a one-point victory on their home court. They followed that up with a unacceptable 59-53 home loss to Seattle. What a way to start the holiday season - barely beating a MEAC school and losing to a D-I independent, both at home. Yuck.