Friday, January 21, 2011

The B.I.A.H Not-Top-10 Rankings

Every week, writers, publications, media outlets and bloggers issue their Top-25 rankings for the week. A majority of the time, everybody has virtually same opinion of all the teams.

If you want to find this week's top-25 rankings, you've come to the wrong place. Here you will find our rankings for the 10 worst team performances in the NCAA. This list isn't just home to the winless mid-major bottom-feeders. No, here you will find the biggest underachievers, slumpers and teams in a funk, the worst weekly performers, and the teams that just plain suck. Now there will be teams on this list that are better than teams not on this list. But come on people, we are trying to be creative, just work with us.


The B.I.A.H Not-Top-10 Rankings

1. Wake Forest
Record: 7-12 (0-4)
They are 0-4 in ACC play and are losing by an average of 26-points in those contests. In their last outing, a 35-point loss to Georgia Tech, the Demon Deacons managed to score only 39-points. They have also lost 9 out of their last 11 games. Their next contest is against Duke. Can you say "seal-clubbing"?


I really can't emphasize just how bad this team is. I'd bet my lunch money that the Deacs don't win a single ACC game this season. That's saying a lot, because after all, the ACC is pretty bad.


2. DePaul
Record: 6-12 (0-6)

I hope Oliver Purnell doesn't mind losing, because, well DePaul figures to do allot of that in the Big East conference. in fact, all they do in conference play is lose. They have yet to win a Big East game, and other than a 2-point scare they game West Virginia, they haven't been close to getting a W. Their last game against Marquette ended in a 35-point shellacking. The lone bright spot for the Blue Demons is freshman Cleveland Melvin. He is leading the team with 14-ppg, and is likely a lock for the Big East all-freshman team. Other than that, DePaul is DePaulful.


3. Texas Tech
Record: 8-11 (0-4)

Texas Tech is losing to Big-12 competition by an average of 21.5-ppg. In fact, in back-to-back games, against Texas and Kansas State, they lost by a combined 65-points, which is more than the Red Raiders scored in either of those contests. Plus, their most recent loss came to Oklahoma, the other Big-12 team battling for BCS-Conference suckitude.


It's kind of a shame they are this bad, because Mike Singletary and John Roberson are tremendous players, but it just so happens the rest of their team blows.


4. UNLV
Record: 14-5 (2-3)

Hey, remember that time UNLV was 9-0 and surging up the rankings on their way to legitimacy? Yeah, seems like eons ago, doesn't it? Since the beginning of the new calender year, The Runnin' Rebels are 2-3, lost to Colorado State at home by 15, and don't have back-to-back wins since before Christmas. UNLV was once considered a contender to win the MWC, but with the way BYU and SDSU are playing right now, UNLV looks more like pretenders.


5. Kansas State
Record: 13-6 (1-3)

I think it's safe to say that K-State is the biggest disappointment of the season thus far. They've got issues everywhere, on and off the court. Jacob Pullen went from budding superstar at the beginning of the season to full-fledged stubborn prima donna. The Wildcats haven't won back-to-back games since the beginning on January, when they beat North Florida and Savannah State. In fact, K-State has losses to UNLV (another Not-Top-10-Team), Florida (who beat Auburn by FIVE), Oklahoma State by 14, Colorado by 8 and Missouri by 16. Frank Martin must be losing his mind.


6. Central Florida
Record: 14-3 (1-3)


No team in the country has had a bigger reality check than the Knights of UCF. They completed their non-con schedule without a blemish, and reached as high as No. 21 in the national rankings. But since C-USA play started, they are just 1-3 and have dropped their last three games. In the 14 games UCF has won, Marcus Jordan is averaging 17-ppg, and in the three games they have lost, he is only averaging 13-ppg. Conference-USA is better than people expected, so UCF cannot afford to slip up any more than they already have.


7. Bradley
Record: 6-13 (0-8)

The Braves have only two wins since Thanksgiving. They are yet to defeat a conference opponent are ranked 270th or higher in the four major statistical categories. They will get a chance to finally get a conference win, when they host Illinois State, the MVC's other winless team, on January 26th. Remember, when your thinking about how bad your day is, there is somebody out there covering this basketball team for a living



8. Drexel
Record: 11-6 (3-4)

Ok, listen, Drexel isn't a bad team. They aren't particularly great, but they certainly aren't bad. Bruiser Flint is a good coach and they have some quality wins (Rider, at Louisville, Old Dominion). But it seems like every season, the Dragons get tossed-n-turned in CAA play. The Dragons are 2-3 since the start of 2011, and, although two of the losses were to the top two teams in the league (Hofstra, VCU), they also have a 24-point loss to evenly-matched George Mason and a unforgivable 14-point loss at William & Mary. Hopefully the Dragons can get back to their winning ways with upcoming games against Northeastern and Georgia State .


9. Quinnipiac
Record: 12-6 (4-3)

The Bobcats make the list because of one thing: An injured Justin Rutty. The forward is a two-time NEC first-teamer and was last season's conference PoY. Since Rutty went out with an injured elbow on January 10th, the Bobcats have gone 1-3 and all of the losses have come against sub-.500 teams. The Bobcats are ranked 2nd in the country in rebounding, but that was due in large part to Rutty's 9.6-rpg. Just like Drexel, I'm not saying Quinnipiac is bad. But I am certainly saying that they are struggling, bad.


10. Christian Standhardinger

I imagine you've heard about this guy by now. The 6'8 German import was going to transfer from Nebraska because of a lack of playing time, and was planning on transferring to LaSalle. The only problem is that Christian tried to "shack-up" with a coed in a local park and was busted for public indecency. LaSalle found out and now he won't be transferring. OK, listen: You're not in Germany anymore. I know Germany (and all of Europe for that matter) is a pretty liberal place when it comes to sex, but unfortunately, you're in Nebraska, which is practically the polar-opposite of Germany. Listen, I went to Central Europe for a month back in school. But I made sure I knew my surroundings. I did my best to not look, act, or do anything remotely American.


3 comments:

Jamie said...

DePaul and Marquette have played each other a lot over the years, but they are not cross-town rivals. DePaul is in Chicago and Marquette is in Milwaukee.

Rob Dauster said...

Oh man. Epic brain fart. Apologies.

Troy Machir said...

Yeah, my bad bout DePaul/Marquette. But you know what I meant.

Plus, I'm wicked sick with the flu, so you have to cut me some slack